Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Oh, How I Need You
I listened to this song several times in the car this evening. I sang along at the top of my lungs. I praised. I prayed.
I wept for the needs in Monterrey.
I wept for the loss of my grandmother.
I wept because the loneliness I've felt since her passing is almost tangible.
I wept because I'm not a mom yet.
I wept for orphaned little girls in India.
I wept because I want God to use me.
I wept because I don't know how God is using me.
I wept because I don't know what my "mission field" is.
I wept because I probably actually do know what my "mission field" is, and I'm not doing anything about it most days.
I wept because I don't know how to process my feelings and thoughts most days.
I wept because I didn't know what else to do before the Lord.
"Jesus wept." (John 11:35)
Jesus is no stranger to tears. He gets it.
"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words." (Romans 8:26)
In moments like this evening, I am reassured that the Holy Spirit understands my deepest thoughts and feelings even better than I do, and He knows how to pray for me. He never stops interceding for me.
He. Never. Stops.